Code of Conduct
BANGLORE QUEER TANGO (BQT)
WHO ARE WE?
Bangalore queer tango is a safe-space for queer, trans*, genderfluid and non-binary persons looking to be part of a community that embraces each other in dance and with respect.
BQT, started in early 2023, is a space where members of the queer community in Bangalore come together to learn tango, a dance form created by the immigrant and working class community in/around Bueno Aires, Argentina in the late 19th century.
Tango holds immense possibilities for us to express joy, love, melancholia and more emotions through music, while we hold another person in a safe embrace. We are working towards building a queer tango community that is anchored in queer visibility, expression and joy.
While our learning space is exclusively for the members of the queer community, our Milongas and Practicas are open to allies (unless specified otherwise) .
WHAT DOES IT MEAN TO BE PART OF BQT COMMUNITY?
BQT is a space that is driven by the spirit of community, while also holding space for individuality.
We believe that building a safe space for queer community in Tango requires continuous effort and care-work from each of its members so the community can feel assured that they will not be exposed to discrimination, harassment, and mental or physical harm; and in the event that they are, that all measures are taken to re-establish safety . We strive to work collectively to make each of our members feel safe, included and find comfort within BQT.
Tango is essentially about a musical conversation between two individuals, their bodies, and their emotions. There is never ONE way of expressing oneself. So, we constantly work towards maintaining the spirit of diversity at BQT by listening to each other and building sensitivity through Tango.
At BQT, we do not adhere to any gender norms when it comes to LEADING or FOLLOWING in Tango. We respect everyone’s choice to lead and/or follow as and when they prefer (it may be helpful to take feedback from the facilitator regarding this)
CODE OF CONDUCT
SHOWING UP ON TIME: At BQT, It is an important gesture to show up on time for classes. This gesture reassures the facilitator for their effort in teaching. However, we do acknowledge crip time in order to be neuro affirmative and will ensure due recommendations to the facilitator, if any needs of accessibility have to be addressed, and we encourage participants to share these needs as they register.
Also, we encourage paying up for the classes in advance, again as a gesture of respect for the care and labor that goes into BQT classes.
MUTUAL RESPECT: We encourage everyone to practice mutual respect towards each other in the BQT community. This includes respecting time, effort, feedback and collective decisions that BQT may take from time to time. While expressing yourself at BQT, and in giving/taking feedback, communicate with respect and kindness.
LEAD/FOLLOW: We do not assume the Tango roles of leading and following based on a person’s gender expression, body image (tall/short), age or experience. Similarly we do not suggest/advise a person on what role they may be ‘good at’. This has to be the dancer’s own choice of expression. We also emphasize on using gender neutral language while teaching, learning and dancing. For example, we do not assume that a leader is a male/he/him or a follower is a female/she/her. We either use the terms ‘leader’ and ‘follower’ or use gender neutral pronouns such as they/them.
PERSONAL HYGIENE: Tango being a close contact dance form, we encourage that every member maintain basic hygiene by using mints, hand sanitiser, deodorant etc. In case you have a mild flu/cold, we suggest you wear a mask while dancing with your partner.
CABECEO/MIRADA: While inviting someone else to dance with you, respect the other person’s choice in case they turn your request down. Do not coerce or force the other person to dance with you (for leading or following).
ACCESSING SPACES OUTSIDE BQT: Since we are an emerging queer community within the larger Tango community (in Bangalore and other parts of India) , we may need to interact with this larger Tango community in order to grow (although this in no way is a yardstick to become a better dancer). And while some of us may feel comfortable/confident in accessing non-BQT spaces to learn/dance/perform/participate in Tango, we should be mindful that many others may not feel the same sense of safety or comfort. In such situations, if anyone feels the need to create a support system (for example, going to these spaces in groups of 3/ 4 or asking others to look out for them), BQT is open to making these accommodations through collective discussion. On the other hand, community members’ preference to adhere to BQT spaces to learn and dance should be respected and not be met with any ableist judgements.
ADDRESSING DISCOMFORTS: While dancing with your partner, at any point if you feel uncomfortable, unsafe or anxious, feel free to verbally communicate your discomfort with your partner or just leave the dance saying ‘thank you’. Please reach out to any one or more members of BQT to seek help, support or mediate confrontation, if need be. We will be holding quarterly meetings facilitated by our safety committee members to hold space for any emotional, physical, psychological distress, body experiences, and conversations around safety. All members of the community are welcome to attend these meetings and share their experiences.
FOR ALLIES: We at BQT welcome allies to dance together during Milongas and Practicas, however there are some important boundaries to be maintained.
Maintain mutual respect between each other, as dance partners and as individuals.
Asking intrusive questions (for example, “are you a lesbian/gay/bisexual, transperson?”) is a big NO NO at BQT spaces. Respect everyone’s boundaries.
Assuming/commenting on another person’s gender/sexual orientation/class/caste location from their attire, mannerism or dance is not allowed.
Homophobia in any form (comments, compliments, jokes, physical touch, etc.) will not be tolerated.
Nourish the dance space by being gentle and accommodative of each other.
SAFETY COMMITTEE: At any point if you experience harassment or discomfort from anyone from within the community, or outside of it (within the limits of dance space), you can reach out to the BQT safety committee that currently consists of three BQT members: Raju, Deeksha, Neelima. You can reach out either over email bqtsafetycommittee@gmail.com or directly talking to one or more of them, expressing your discomfort and your expectations of redressal (if any). The safety committee members will communicate with you the possible way ahead.
The safety committee comprises of three members from BQT who have volunteered to take up this position based on their experience. The safety committee is envisioned as a rotational post that changes every year.
The member who has experienced discomfort/harassment to be referred as: complainant, the person against whom a complaint has been registered: respondent.
Harassment comprises but is not limited to sexual harassment as defined under the The Sexual Harassment of Women at Workplace (Prevention, Prohibition and Redressal) Act, 2013:
“sexual harassment” includes any one or more of the following unwelcome acts or behavior (whether directly or by implication) namely:—
(i) physical contact and advances; or
(ii) a demand or request for sexual favours; or
(iii) making sexually coloured remarks; or
(iv) showing pornography; or
(v) any other unwelcome physical, verbal or non-verbal conduct of sexual nature
However, discomfort or harassment is not limited to what is defined under the law above, and also includes physical, sexual violence, discrimination on the basis of caste, gender identity and ableism.
CONTENT PRODUCTION: Any visual content, such as posters, captions, videos, audio, etc., being created and published on social media for BQT, should be carefully curated in order to not impose stereotypes regarding gender expression, body image, role preferences and more. For example, images/photographs being used to promote Milonga can avoid using the representative image of ‘ an assertive figure of a man with a submissive figure of a woman’. We encourage that production of audio-visual content about BQT be shared with the members for feedback, in order to get a collective review. We are emphasizing on this part because at BQT, we believe in working towards a more diverse and creative visual representation, rather than adhering to the norms created by heteronormative standards of aesthetics.
This specific BQT document is a work-in-progress document and will be reviewed at regular intervals so that it does not serve as a rigid punitive document. BQT is open to listening to suggestions and recommendations on the nature of the document, its accessibility and expansion, in a way that ensures safe space for its members.
Resources:
This document has drawn inspiration from the following guidelines: